Thursday, May 13, 2010

How Not to Drown

Libby has recently started swimming lessons. She was super excited about learning how to swim until she discovered that meant putting her face in the water.

She tried to quit after one lesson, but I told her that it was important to learn to swim so that she didn't accidentally drown. (Fear mongering, motivation. Potato, potahto.)

Since then Libby has devised a sure fire method of not drowning that requires no swimming skill whatsoever.

Step 1: Start crying before your lesson starts. Sympathy works wonders!


Step 2: Tearfully explain to your swim teacher why you think going under is unnecessary. Point out that it is really in his best interest to listen to you because the other kid's parents are starting to whisper that Mr. Keith must be pinching that sweet girl who is always crying!
Step 3: When step 2 fails, attempt to do things your own way anyways by swimming to Mr. Keith with your head above water.

Step 4: Cry hysterically when he makes you put your head under despite all of your attempts to keep your hair dry. Choking on some pool water at this point is a nice touch too.


Step 5: Pitch such an unholy fit, that another instructor (who has also heard the pinching rumors) takes pity on you (or on Mr. Keith, you don't care at this point) and comes over to lend a helping hand. This step is crucial, because having the extra certified swim teacher close at hand doubles your chances of not drowning.
Step 6: Throw Mr. Keith a bone and swim just a little bit. (Because you do still want to get that lollipop mommy promised you when your swim lesson is over!)




PhotoStory Friday
Hosted by Cecily and Lolli

17 comments:

Emily said...

Yes, it is important to learn how to swim since her mommy wouldn't be able to save her. *ahem* ;)

That is too funny! Poor Mr Keith looks very concerned that people are going to start believing the pinching rumors!

Jen said...

Are you sure she is not in Hayden's swim lessons? ;)

Life with Kaishon said...

Don't you just *ADORE* little drama queens? How can you not? She is the cutest! Love her suit! Very pretty!

Emmy said...

Looks like she has patient teachers. My son was about to take swimming lessons in June... But if he and Ale stay with grandma until the baby can leave the NICU he is going to miss those :(. I will have to see if there are some later in the summer. I am afraid he is going to freak out too

shortmama said...

If Rhiannon were in swim lessons she would probably do the same thing. I cant get that kid off the stairs!

Chris said...

I'd say Mr. Keith earned his money that day :)

Pam Emmons said...

Hmmm. my problem was always that I couldn't keep my kids faces OUT of the water. New struggles.

Momisodes said...

I believe your daughter and mine may have shared schemes. We had similar tears at her swimming lessons!

Krystyn said...

Those are some patient teachers! I wonder how our pool adventures will go this summer!

(I sure laughed at your story. Those mean pinching teachers!)

Twigs @ Twiggles and Trunks said...

lol. poor kid. i've heard of those nasty pool pinching swim instructors.

Rachel said...

I'm so giggling - is that bad?

Love the picture series!

My mom enrolled me in Water Babies as an infant (grew up in Cali around lots of pools). They literally have a tall chainlink fence around the training pool because parents freak out when the instructor blows in their baby's face and throws them in the water. I think I would have a heart attack (or climb the fence and hurt someone)...

Hope Libby figures out that she enjoys swimming underwater soon! :)

Summer said...

I can relate to poor Libby....When I first started swim lessons, my mom said I was the only child who could go through that entire hour without getting one hair on my head wet! LOL! (eventually, I had to give in...)

imbeingheldhostage said...

awwwww, but she's so stinking cute. Hey, she's pretty enterprising, you're
getting two instructors for the price of one.

Angie S said...

i'm scared layla may do this at swimming lesssons...ughhh!

she is adorable...sad face and all :)

Sierra said...

Boy! Aren't swim lessons just the best? It'll get better and then one day she can rescue you ;-)

heidi said...

Oh ma, you do abuse that poor child, don't you?? Sheesh.

ιŸ‹δΊŽε€«ζˆ said...

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