Monday, February 2, 2009

Not Me Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

Disclaimer: None of the events listed in today's Not Me Monday actually occurred! This list is completely fictional! Or if some of these things did happen somewhere in the world, I certainly was not involved. Nope, not me! I mean, let's face it, I am practically perfect in every way! (Oh, no wait! That's my sister!)

I did not buy 25 new itunes downloads before I realized I need to redeemed my gift card first!

I did not then redeem said gift card and then download 25 more songs!

I did not drive all the way from Tampa to Atlanta with two small children by myself just to go to a two-year-old's birthday party!

I did not put the Miss PattyCake dvd on repeat and then totally tune out my children while I jammed to my new tunes! No way, the girls and I carried on stimulating and thought-provoking conversations the whole way!

I did not indulge on tons of very healthy treats that Emily baked for me! Those chocolate peanut butter cookies and ginger spice cake were definitely fat free! And the cream cheese baked inside of pilsbury biscuit dough was certainly a South Beach phase 1 treat!

And I definitely did not have a glass of wine with Emily after the kids went to bed! I mean, hello, I am pregnant! (And for the record, I also have never consumed sushi, tropical fish, lunch meat or brie cheese while pregnant! Oh no, I am the poster mama for a healthy diet while pregnant! And I always remember to take my prenatal vitamin!)

I did not see Twilight for the third time. I mean, that would be borderline obssessive.

I did not eat more than half of the adult's Chick-fil-A tray at Melody's birthday party by myself! I think we have already established that I am in no way gluttonous!

I do not look twice as pregnant after three days of visiting Emily than I did when I arrived. And I am definitely not blaming my best friend's awesome cooking!

And finally, in explanation of my shout out to my sister (see disclaimer) I did not grow up with a mother who gave all of her children catch phrases! My mother did not actually refer to my sister as "practically perfect in every way" any more than she referred to me as "more precious than diamonds!" And she definitely never said any of these things in public or in front of our friends. And, despite the rumors, she most definitely did not refer to my brother (who was not the first boy born to our family after 13 consecutive girls) as the only begotten son. That would be sacrilegious! (Just kidding, Mom!)

4 comments:

Krystyn said...

Those definitely all are NOT perfect!

And, I did not laugh out loud!

heidi said...

I never had a glass of wine while pg either. ;-)

Justin and Tammy Norwood said...

You forgot all the diet soda you have NOT had. I did not have any while prego, and do not drink it everyday while nursing.

How is Twilight?

emily said...

I'm definitely NOT going to starting referring to Melody as more precious than diamonds! lol.

We totally did not have a fabulous weekend!